Heather

Thank you, Molly and Sunya, for your encouragement and advice. Very helpful. The residents are, indeed, very much on their own, especially during the weekends. It is heartbreaking.

Hi, I have loved one in a memory support unit of a highly touted senior living facility. I have seen a lot of shortcomings in the activities program, so I signed up as a volunteer, hoping to make a difference. I have become attached to the other residents there. After 2 days of volunteering, I am ready to quit, as I have been mistreated and the staff is mostly hostile toward me. Today I was visiting my loved one, not as a volunteer, and I witnessed something very disturbing. A resident was enjoying a beautiful late afternoon outside. She uses a walker. Suddenly, out of the blue, the head nurse in charge abruptly insisted she come inside because she was going to tire herself out. The tiny lady meekly resisted. The nurse basically forced her in, walking with one hand/arm in her pants ( I still wonder whether to believe my eyes) and the other arm around the patient's midriff. Mind you, the patient also was using her walker. The nurse said "Its alright- we're going inside" or something to that effect. The patient said "Well, it's not alright with me." I spoke up and said to the nurse, "I don't think she likes that." The nurse loudly replied that no one was going to fall on her shift and she continued handling the resident in the same manner. It was totally unnecessary to put her hand down her pants and her arm around the woman's belly. Should I contact the resident's son? Report her to upper management? Is this considered abuse? How should this be handled? Am I overreacting? Incidentally, this comes after 3 black eyes in one week there. During most shifts the staff do not allow the resident's to stand up. They order them to sit back down when they stand up. This isn't normal is it?